My Myriad Affection

Between the shining stars, my moon shimmers. Upon his holy soul my thoughts run in an endless array. The closer I am, the more hurt is felt and feelings residing in both are like secrets untold. Care-he never knew and hatred, I. The going got tougher and people said “when the going gets tough, the tough gets going” but it never did. And a day came when I had to go and I did, and never saw his lovely face again. Until now when my dreams are colored with his and my memories together and tears; this always followed next.

The distance crumbled and tore me apart whereas he was as unaffected, as affected as, I was. My pictures are dark and hurtful now and sorrow has filled my land. I prayed to God to vanish my pain whereas secretly I was simply praying for him.

Days passed with no contact at all and I accepted my seclusion only to know that the holy spirit had different plans. And plans too different than what I had in my mind. My spirit had been shattered into a zillion pieces which to me seemed could never be glued again until of course he comes back to my life.

He’s the glue which keeps all my pieces together, without whom I’m just shattered parts of a puzzle meaningless till all are joined together. He’s everything I ever need, till the time I die. And even after that, my eyes will long to see him and my fingers, to feel his entangled to mine. I regret how I took our moments together for granted and I wish I could tell him, that he’s the everything that completes me, to tell him I don’t mind ending my life if it meant to save his.

One moment I had everything that one needs, and the other I was left with nothing. The game my life played with me was one hell of a game! 

Untraced and unaffected I planned to be, but like my other plans it failed too. I thought he was the stitches I need to heal my wounds, unfortunately he was the salt being rubbed; dangerous and unwanted! Yet I longed for him and shed tears whereas he was on with someone new. The promises he made to me were being made to someone new and different. But for once I wanna say to him:

“hope this one stays."